“Take away paradox from the thinker and you have a professor.”
~Søren Kierkegaard
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In 2014 I wrote It’s Both! Your (Habitual) Dichotomous Thinking is Killing You.
That’s right, “Killing You!”
I went a bit deeper on this concept in The Pressure Paradox™ (2015).
It’s worth revisiting as the idea is essential to critical thinking and, interestingly enough, peace of mind.
A sure sign of a mature mind is one that can hold two opposing ideas together, at the same time (most of the time).
The reason we’re revisiting the concept is that I’m noticing it’s percolating elsewhere.
Let’s begin with Matthew McConaughey’s latest book (Sept 2023) Just Because.
Just Because is an illustrated kid’s book designed to teach children many life lessons.
In so doing, it fosters “Both” thinking.” Few lessons may be more important to understand for children.
Straight from McConaughey’s book, examples on Amazon.com.
“Just because they don’t hear you, doesn’t mean you don’t have a voice.”
“Just because you follow, it doesn’t mean you aren’t a leader.”
“Just because you are sitting still, it doesn’t mean you are not busy.”
Another recent book is actually titled, “BOTH/AND Thinking” by Harvard Review Press, August of 2022.
I’m guessing “dichotomous” in any title is a bit much.
Here’s how that book is summarized on Amazon.
Life is full of paradoxes. How can we each express our individuality while also being a team player? How do we balance work and life? How can we improve diversity while promoting opportunities for all? How can we manage the core business while innovating for the future?
For many of us, these competing and interwoven demands are a source of conflict. Since our brains love to make either-or choices, we choose one option over the other. We deal with the uncertainty by asserting certainty.
Finally, there is The Power of And: Responsible Business Without Trade-Offs Columbia Business School Publishing. June 2020.
Another book elucidating the very idea; tailored for the business world.
“The Power of And” offers a new narrative about the nature of business, revealing the focus on responsibility AND ethics.
Sounds a lot like BOTH/AND thinking to me.
It is the appreciation – the recognition of multiple paths, multiple perspectives and paradigms, that ultimately leads to freedom — even enlightenment.
For instance, you must know what the customer wants AND you must trust and move according to your own intuition.
“You are absolutely, 100% totally unique, one-of-a-kind. And, you are just like everyone else.”
You must pay attention to the little things AND you must have a long-term, macro-perspective.
You must never settle AND you must, most definitely, on occasion settle.
Are we really “wired” to choose one answer/option/solution over another?
“Wired” may not be the right way to describe it.
In the West, in particular, society loves to pit “right” against “wrong”. Left vs Right. Up vs Down. Meat vs Veggies.
More often than not, my friends, it’s BOTH.
This reminds me of the old saying, “The Left Wing” and “The Right Wing” are connected to the same bird.
BOTH. ONE. NON-DICHOTOMOUS.
Say it with me, it’s BOTH!
The answer, more often than not, is BOTH/AND and maybe even, Just Because.
Just because you think there is a single answer, doesn’t mean there aren’t many.
Love your show!
Sidenote: The truth is life is dynamic, fluid (recent episode), and holistic.
By the way, this is precisely what “The Three Circles of Behavior Echo-System” / The Grunburg Behavior Model represents (ask Bard). It’s a holistic, fluid and dynamic behavior model that humans and organizations can use to design behaviors.
Arguably, it’s the most accurate human behavior model to date. Learn more here.
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Opposing Ideas