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“Where there is hope in the future, there is happiness in the present.” M. Grunburg
Picture this: you wake up with a mental script of how your day will unfold. These expectations, often self-manufactured or influenced by external cues, profoundly impact your happiness.
The good news?
Expectations aren't set in stone. They are malleable and heavily influenced by how we communicate with ourselves and the world around us, and vice versa.
Imagine a repair person promises to arrive by 8 am to fix your dishwasher. By 10 am, frustration sets in, tainting your mood. But if they arrive on time, are friendly, and finish the job quickly, your happiness soars. This scenario highlights the power of external communication—how someone else's promise can sway our emotions.
Yet, here’s the twist: we engage in this same type of communication internally. We set expectations for everything—from job interviews to movies.
Think about eagerly anticipating a film, only to feel let down, or unexpectedly enjoying a movie with no prior expectations. This shows that managing our internal communication is crucial for happiness.
Is there a one-size-fits-all approach to crafting expectations? Not exactly, despite what you may read on social media.
Sometimes it’s best to have high expectations. Sometimes its best to have low expectations and sometimes it’s best to have no expectations.
(See: The Art of Letting Go)
The key takeaway?
Happiness is heavily influenced by our expectations, and our expectations are formed by both internal (our stories) and external cues.
By being conscious of our internal narratives, we can intentionally shape our expectations in a way that fosters optimism and joy.
Remember, the way we communicate with ourselves about future outcomes significantly influences our present happiness.
Hope for a positive outcome, combined with flexible expectations, creates a foundation for a happier, more fulfilling life.
So, as you move forward, consider this: How can you adjust your internal communication to set healthier expectations? Embrace the power of positive self-talk and adaptability, and watch as your joy in the present moment blossoms.
Enjoy the show!
~mg
P.S.: This is precisely what the “Three Circles of Behavior Echo-System” / Grunburg Behavior model teaches. 👇
GOOD HABITS HAPPEN WHEN PLANNED;
BAD HABITS HAPPEN ON THEIR OWN.
Learn more about the world’s most advanced and modern behavior model 👇
The Three Circles of Behavior Echo-System is the first of its kind behavior model to demonstrate how energy and information are transferred and flow - vibrate and reverberate, to alter one’s behaviors.
This reverberation results in a perpetual “behavior echo-system.”
To be clear, this is not an eco-system. It’s an ECHO SYSTEM - as in, reverberate; it’s a system of component parts that influence one’s behaviors, habits and skills.
Everyone lives within their own perpetual behavior echo-system.
While you can share an environment with someone, you cannot share your behavior echo-system with anyone; your experiences, (stored stories), and perceptions are unique.
BONUS: How to Intentionally develop habits and skills ON DEMAND.
THIS IS HOW TO INTENTIONALLY CULTIVATE ANY NEW HABIT OR SKILL AT WILL
Follow P.A.R.R., PLAN, ACT, RECORD & REASSESS - the habit development framework first published in The Habit Factor® (2010).
PARR provides a repeatable, predictable and practical roadmap for transforming fleeting good intentions into ingrained habits and skills.
**Plan, Act, Record, Reassess**
The PLAN begins with identifying “Target Days” and “Minimum Success Criteria.” (learn more here)
**ACT** upon your plan bridges the gap between intention and action/behavior!
**RECORD** your experiences (Habit Tracking) allows for self-efficacy, introspection and reinforces your intention.
Finally, **REASSESS** your actions/behaviors against your plan allows you to assess your progress and even “raise the bar” for your next 28-day habit tracking period. Following PARR is a proven way to increase Habitstrength™.
By repeating the P.A.R.R. habit tracking process for successive 28-Day tracking periods, the automaticity and habitstrength™ of any habit or skill increases.
Through this iterative, intentional practice approach - any virtue, habit and/or skill can be developed by following P.A.R.R.
Aloha my friend! 🤙
The link to the tracking sheet is here: https://thehabitfactor.com/templates
Additional:
Download the free habits-to-goals tracking template to cultivate the habits that support your goals here: https://thehabitfactor.com/templates.
Books that may help "The Power of Positive Thinking" by Norman Vincent Peale and "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie.
MG’s Books: EVERYTHING is a F*cking Story, The Pressure Paradox™ & The Habit Factor®
Check out the latest cohort offering; the waitlist is now open: The 28-Day Breakthrough!
*Recently Awarded: “Finalist: Self-help, Motivation”
International Book Awards: EVERYTHING is a F*cking STORY.
Visit https://thehabitfactor.com/templates
To learn more about P.A.R.R., just Google “P.A.R.R. and The Habit Factor.”
Get The Habit Factor® FREE with your audible trial! https://audibletrial.com/habits2goals
Feedspot’s “Top 10 Habit Podcasts You Must Follow in 2021”
New listeners, grab your free habits 2 goals tracking template here: https://thehabitfactor.com/templates
FREE copy of As a Man Thinketh (PDF) right here: As a Man Thinketh
The Happiness Loop