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“Discipline is a habit—cultivate it.” M. Grunburg
The Great Human Conundrum? Bridging the Gap Between Desire and Action
Great philosophers may argue that the ultimate human conundrum is understanding human consciousness, the meaning of life, or the nature of suffering.
May I suggest a more immediate, everyday dilemma: our inability to act upon our desires consistently… or, to be more accurate, more consistently.
This human riddle manifests itself every flippin’ day; we vow to quit smoking only to light up again. We resolve to clean our room only to procrastinate. We pledge to eat healthily only to scarf down another triple-stroke burger.
Repeat.
This puzzle is so pervasive that it arguably constitutes the foundation of the entire personal development industry.
Think about it — nearly every gooroo out there is just trying to help you do what you say you want to do when you want to do it.
That’s it.
“HEY, BUT, I’M JUST NOT THAT DISCIPLINED.”
If I had a nickel…
That excuse doesn’t fly ‘round these parts.
When was the last time you met a disciplined baby?
Discipline is a character trait—developed like other character traits—over time.
In essence, discipline is a habit.
Crafting Habits with Intention
Good habits happen when planned; bad habits happen on their own.
Nobody needs to track bad habits though, do they?
Those seem to develop almost naturally.
Sleeping in late doesn’t require habit tracking. Nor does drinking too many beers or eating too many chips or cheeseburgers.
ENTER P.A.R.R.» YOU’RE PATH TO FREEDOM
Freedom?
Yes.
No man is free who cannot command himself. ~Pythagoras
Can you command yourself?
How well do you command yourself?
PARR stands for Plan, Act, Record, and Reassess.
PARR teaches you to intentionally craft and align habits that support your goals and ideals.
Here’s how it works:
PLAN: Clearly define the habit and set specific daily targets.
Example: "I will eat a salad for lunch on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday." These are your “Target Days.”
This is how you can leverage the rhythm of the week.
Identify the “Minimum Success Criteria.” Are you gonna do 15 pushups for 45? Are you going to read for 30 minutes or 25 pages?
ACT: Commit to performing the behavior on the specified days.
Ensure that necessary preparations are made in advance, such as buying and preparing salad ingredients.
BTW: The beauty of PARR is that you can even miss “Target Days” and still make them up within the same week.
RECORD: Track the habit and be sure to add notes - comments about how it went.
This maintains accountability and provides a visual reminder of progress.
Use the FREE Habits-to-Goals tracking template below or download the free app in iOS store. (Update coming to Google Play store).
REASSESS: Reflect on your progress and adjust as necessary after a set period (e.g., 28 days). Four weeks of tracking is 28 Days.
Review habit-tracking records, noting successes and any obstacles.
Reflect on changes in behavior and any improvements in well-being.
If you hit 85% or better against your targets, increase one or both of the “Minimum Success Criteria” and/or the “Target Days.”
Adjust the plan lower if below 85%.
The answer to the human conundrum: P.A.R.R. provides…
Structured Approach: A step-by-step process to follow, reducing the complexity of habit formation.
Accountability: Regular recording keeps yourself accountable, helping to maintain focus and commitment.
Reflection and Adjustment: Periodic reassessment allows for reflection on progress and necessary adjustments, fostering continuous improvement.
Momentum Building: Following the plan builds momentum and increases HabitStrength™ making the behavior more automatic over time.
Self-Efficacy: Successfully following the plan most days enhances the positive feeling of self-esteem and confidence.
This becomes incredibly motivating (dare I say addicting) as you get a little dopamine spike with each daily checkmark!
When you craft habits that serve your long-term goals, you bridge the frustrating gap between your desires and your behaviors.
Enjoy the show!
~mg
P.S.: This is precisely what the “Three Circles of Behavior Echo-System” / Grunburg Behavior model teaches. 👇
Worth reiterating:
GOOD HABITS HAPPEN WHEN PLANNED;
BAD HABITS HAPPEN ON THEIR OWN.
Learn more about the world’s most advanced and modern behavior model 👇
The Three Circles of Behavior Echo-System is the first of its kind behavior model to demonstrate how energy and information are transferred and flow - vibrate and reverberate, to alter one’s behaviors.
This reverberation results in a perpetual, personal “behavior echo-system.”
To be clear, this is not an eco-system. It’s an ECHO SYSTEM - as in, reverberate; it’s a system of component parts that influence one’s behaviors, habits and skills.
Everyone lives within their own perpetual behavior echo-system.
While you can share an environment with someone, you cannot share your behavior echo-system with anyone; your experiences, (stored stories), and perceptions are unique.
BONUS: How to Intentionally develop habits and skills ON DEMAND. 👇
MORE:
Follow P.A.R.R., PLAN, ACT, RECORD & REASSESS - the habit development framework first published in The Habit Factor® (2010).
PARR provides a repeatable, predictable and practical roadmap for transforming fleeting good intentions into ingrained habits and skills.
**Plan, Act, Record, Reassess**
The PLAN begins with identifying “Target Days” and “Minimum Success Criteria.” (learn more here)
**ACT** upon your plan bridges the gap between intention and action/behavior!
**RECORD** your experiences (Habit Tracking) allows for self-efficacy, introspection and reinforces your intention.
Finally, **REASSESS** your actions/behaviors against your plan allows you to assess your progress and even “raise the bar” for your next 28-day habit tracking period. Following PARR is a proven way to increase Habitstrength™.
By repeating the P.A.R.R. habit tracking process for successive 28-Day tracking periods, the automaticity and habitstrength™ of any habit or skill increases.
Through this iterative, intentional practice approach - any virtue, habit and/or skill can be developed by following P.A.R.R.
Aloha my friend! 🤙
Additional:
Download the free habits-to-goals tracking template to cultivate the habits that support your goals here: https://thehabitfactor.com/templates.
Books that may help "The Power of Positive Thinking" by Norman Vincent Peale and "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie.
MG’s Books: EVERYTHING is a F*cking Story, The Pressure Paradox™ & The Habit Factor®
Check out the latest cohort offering; the waitlist is now open: The 28-Day Breakthrough!
*Recently Awarded: “Finalist: Self-help, Motivation”
International Book Awards: EVERYTHING is a F*cking STORY.
Visit https://thehabitfactor.com/templates
To learn more about P.A.R.R., just Google “P.A.R.R. and The Habit Factor.”
Get The Habit Factor® FREE with your audible trial! https://audibletrial.com/habits2goals
Feedspot’s “Top 10 Habit Podcasts You Must Follow in 2021”
New listeners, grab your free habits 2 goals tracking template here: https://thehabitfactor.com/templates
FREE copy of As a Man Thinketh (PDF) right here: As a Man Thinketh
The Human Conundrum